I feel the need to share this prayer from 2 nights ago. I keep a prayer journal on my phone so I can see God's hand working in my life. This is still my heart:
As I lay here in the bed I am dreaming of a brown haired chubby cheeked baby girl. She has wrist roles and soft skin and she smells.....oh she has that heavenly newborn smell. I have never met her but how I long for the day that I get to. Shiloh. Mommy loves you. I know you will be. I am sure you will be.
Oh may our great and powerful God create you in 2014 in my womb. May he fashion you for your husband and bless us with your presence. I miss you so much though we've never met. My heart hurts so badly for you. For Haddon. For the precious ones we've already said goodbye to. I ache in my soul. Never has there been a pain like this ever. There are no words only tears.
Lord I beg you for mercy. Give me a child lest this heartache overtake me and lead me to death. I am overwhelmed with grief and sorrow. Oh to feel a baby kick in my womb. To be nauseated and sleepy. I need this Lord. I can't imagine living with this agony much longer. It has been excruciating and heavy. Take it God. Please just let this season pass from me. Remove my reproach. Embrace me and fill my womb with beautiful healthy children and in the mean time, keep my mind focused on you and your word. I pray the waiting would end soon and pass quickly.
Will you continue to pray? For strength as we wait and for God's blessing to be upon us....
No comments:
Post a Comment